april6263 wrote:

CEK40 wrote:

JetmamaDiDi wrote:

 
Well, this is true--and Maks has a need to resolve stuff with exes and former partners. So maybe this is some tantrum that he's got going right now?! LOL I think that people who always try to "fix" things like he does just have conflict about themselves. It's a lack of confidence--and that it is ok to have a problem with someone that maybe can't be resolved--and then you have to let it go. I am a person who doesn't really like conflict, but I do stand on principle and I voice my opinion. I don't expect everyone to agree with me. You realize you can't please everyone and you make a value judgement about how important or unimportant the person as a WHOLE is--and decide if some issue is worth giving up the relationship. Most of the time it isn't worth sacrificing the relationship. I'll bet Maks tries to fix everything with everybody because he can't forgive himself for his possible role in creating the problem.

Jet I think you are on to something here...I do believe that Maks has a huge problem with lack of confidence and he over compensates in other ways...I don't mean things that are bad but I think sometime he doesn't know what to do to make things right and he is always trying to fix something when he neglects to look at himself...

and we have to remember Maks normal pattern...he tries to fix things and puts alot of pressure on himself and when it gets to much and the frustration builds he lashes out....Meryl figured that out in week six....and she gave us the answer....when he lashes out he needs to fall back on the friendship...

 And TRUST in the friendship....  From Maks' point of view, I think trust means letting his vulnerability show.

april6263 wrote:

Neenay wrote:

Hey all... I must admit I have been "lurking" all summer....this site has helped me maintain my sanity relative to MnM....I registered and logged on (to be honest, I'm not sure if this is by invitation only) ..to thank you all for your insight....I'm keeping the faith!

HEY Neenay!!!!  welcome to the ship!!! no invitation needed!! glad you decided to join us...feel free to jump in anytime!!!  glad your here

Welcome Neenay to Maksyl World...we are a fun group...glad you joined us 

JetmamaDiDi wrote:

april6263 wrote:

JetmamaDiDi wrote:

 
Oh--I remember that now that you reposted it. At first I was trying to kinda take his side. Now I'm just not sure so will reserve judgement for a while. This is where I think the internet and SM really mess with people's lives. I still say that if he really wants his private or personal life to be private, he is not with this dame....or he wouldn't be in public with her. It just looks bad, tho....and angers his fans which is not a good thing. If he wants people to accuse him of stuff he says he is not, then he should act the part ALL the time!!! Rhetoric doesn't cut it if your actions are not consistent with the rhetoric. Then you are a hypocrite. I so do not want that to be who he is.

you know we talked about how Meryl is going through alot of life changes and needs time....but so is Maks....he went from being on top of the world after the win, took a trip to India...where by the way he behaved himself quite well...to come home to a massive storm of sm and and gossip show backlash and hate over something we now know he did absolutely nothing to derserve...his tried with quiet dignity during this time to go on with buisness as usual and took ALL the heat onto his own shoulders..(just my opinion..to protect Meryl)....and through all this his buisness life has forever changed...he gave up his career admittedly so he wouldn't feel like he was cheating on Meryl...thats alot for anyone to deal with...what's he doing now???  idk....but i think maybe he needs our understanding and support as much as if not more than Meryl does

 
No doubt he needs to find someone to talk to about whatever is going on with him--and them--to try to understand himself and the situation(s). Without working through his issues, he wil never find happiness or be able to be in a committed relationship, no matter what his "dream" is. Might be a bit of Peter Pan syndrome there.

I volunteer to talk to him and won't charge him a dime. I promise not to become too emotional!
 

annieahoy wrote:

april6263 wrote:

annieahoy wrote:

April, you're the one who posted the videos for us; you know, the four videos that explained how Maks feels about Meryl. He articulated so beautifully his opinion of her, his admiration, so many great things he said that it almost sounded like a Nicholas Sparks novel. How could he go from that to the man we think we are seeing now? 
I don't want anything I say to sound like a defense of Maks or Meryl; I'm just trying to make sense of it all because that's how my psyche works. It's easy to defend Meryl, but I don't know about Maks now. I'm wondering if he's sort of gone off the deep end over the DWTS thing. If you saw him on Extra when Tony asked if he would like to judge, Maks' face lit up and he said, of course I would judge -- I have a lot to say! I think he took it for granted that he could be hired as a judge, and when that didn't happen, it may have thrown him into a tailspin. He may be acting out now without saying it but perhaps his attitude is this: Well! DWTS rejected me and some people may look down on me for that, so I'll show everybody!  I'll go on this five-day luxury trip to Italy and take a woman with me. How many of YOU were important enough to be invited? He may actually be trying to mask pain and going about it all wrong.
Let's face it -- he's not going to marry this girl unless he has gone completely off the deep end. And, if he were to do something so foolish, it wouldn't last.
He may be worried about future ventures too.  First -- acting. He has no guarantee of being successful at this and he must know it. That has to be scary.
Then, the jewelry. I sincerely hope and pray that I don't offend anyone here -- we all have a right to our different tastes. Maks is dealing with the men's jewelry, and, let's face it, most men won't wear jewelry other than a watch or wedding ring. Two women who interviewed Maks for a TV (or radio) show said they would love to buy a piece for their husbands, but they don't wear jewelry. Remember the gold chains of the 70s? That was a fad that didn't last too long. Most men who would go around now with a shirt unbuttoned down to there and a chain on would be ridiculed. The biggest clients for this would be for a costume (Halloween or other) or dancing. Hipsters and gays would go for it, but most hipsters couldn't affort it . The stuff is NOT cheap. This is an Italian company, and Italians don't always have the same tastes as Americans. Italy is where most of the jewelry would be sold, and I don't know if Maks' promotion of it would do that much good. 
I'm just rambling and rattling and trying to made sense of the world and hope I haven't offended anyone. If you disagree with me, I won't be upset, and would want to know. I get a lot from others' opinions that are different from mine.

Annie i don't know what's going on with Maks...i wish i did...but i don't think there are any cut and dried answers...we are trying to understand him from our points of view on life and thats not going to work because he comes from a different place...i think Meryl understands his world because the ice skating world is similar to the dance world...or why he's doing different things...but right now all i do know is that since he came back from India this man who has done so much to help with charities that are aimmed at preventing bullying and abuse....has himself been the recipient of it on sm....he is going through alot of big life changes right now too....so maybe we don't need to understand him...maybe we just need to "hold his hand"...while he works it out...

And, you can imagine how he was bullied when he came to this country and lived in Brooklyn, NY, and was a dancer! Boys in this country who take dancing are generally considered to be sissies, gay, or somehow warped. Here, especially in Texas, it's all about huntin' and fishin'. In Europe there is not the same attitude about boys' dancing; there are historical reasons for this that I won't go into now. Just think -- Maslow's hierarchy of needs and how much older Europe is than the U.S. and has had more time to fulfull the basic needs and then move onto the arts. Nothing against hunters here, and I think it's easier for grown men to take dancing lessons.
 

 
You make a good point, Annie; in Maks' terms it's the planetary difference.  He feels a certain distance--or perhaps uses it as an excuse?  Even though he has adapted very well, we have no idea what early childhood, communistic characteristics still impact him in some way or another.  Sure, he obviously really appreciates America, but he also carries baggage from his struggles in Ukraine/USSR.  Those are big influences, I'm sure.  It would be an interesting conversation to have with him.....

april6263 wrote:

CEK40 wrote:

april6263 wrote:

Annie i don't know what's going on with Maks...i wish i did...but i don't think there are any cut and dried answers...we are trying to understand him from our points of view on life and thats not going to work because he comes from a different place...i think Meryl understands his world because the ice skating world is similar to the dance world...or why he's doing different things...but right now all i do know is that since he came back from India this man who has done so much to help with charities that are aimmed at preventing bullying and abuse....has himself been the recipient of it on sm....he is going through alot of big life changes right now too....so maybe we don't need to understand him...maybe we just need to "hold his hand"...while he works it out...

Well said April...

wish i knew how to start a hastag thing on twitter....i would get fans to send him #holdmyhand  ...nothing else just #holdmyhand to show him some support....

 
Does CEK know?